Love changes

What am I doin’? What am I doin’?
Oh, yeah, that’s right, I’m doin’ me
I’m doin me
I’m livin’ life right now

And this what I’ma do ’til it’s over
‘Til it’s over
But it’s far from over…..

- OVER -- DRAKE

Looking back on scattered memories I have of growing up and becoming a woman, I realized that there have been so many changes and that change is inevitable, but it got me thinking about what is important.  What matters more than material objects are the relationships you have made, the wisdom you have acquired, the lessons you have learned, and most importantly the relationship with yourself that has grown, developed and hopefully strengthened over time.
I have had a lot of hardships in my life and faced a lot of adversity.  I had so much resentment growing up for the spoiled people around me who seemed to have everything handed to them on a silver platter.  Growing up, other children used to taunt me for what I wore, for being 20 or so pounds overweight, for being pale, the list goes on.
I did not have the finances available to me to buy nice clothing and so I wore hand-me-downs and the same things over and over from seasons too far past to even recognize.  Many girls I went to school with would never wear the same things twice and were given expensive cars and designer purses prior to their 16th birthday.
I was born in a town I watched turn into a city; close to Toronto and surrounded by what is commonly referred to as a "bubble", where people live ignorantly and blissfully with their riches and gossip.
Most people will say one thing to your face and then go and say something completely different behind your back, and girls often wear the same brands, even exact items, and end up looking like one generic style.
I have since moved out of this city and had many life changing experiences; I have been introduced to more culture, different lifestyles, and genuine people that have taught me appreciation, released my resentment, and most importantly strengthened my self esteem.
Looking back I must point out that where I used to feel jealousy, anger, and hate, those are feelings that don't reside in me any more and I love life every day.  The people who I used to envy have only made me stronger and more dedicated to an artistic, individual, honest life free of negative influences or opinions.  In a few famous and cliched words, "your hate has only made me stronger".

I thought I would show a few pictures from my past, just me being me!  (With some extra weight kicking around!  Curves are beautiful and I definitely miss mine.)

My prom dress, big smile and too much make up.  2005
Dress, Marciano
Necklace, Le Chateau

Representing Canada Day in Ottawa,  (day before my birthday) on my 19th.  2006
Dress, Guess

On a boat cruise about to enjoy some Mahi-mahi.  Dress was borrowed from a girlfriend.  2007

 

Just practicing my bartending skills on the way downtown.  2007

Jeans, Guess.

Ringing in New Years 2008 with my best friend in the whole world!  Love and miss my Natalie <3 

That's all for now...

Still practicing with my Cannon!

Fantastic photos soon :)

Xo Veronica